I was recently asked in a blog comment about the decisions we will make regarding Lizzy Face’s diet, with particular reference to the battle between the veggie Fergotron and the carnivorous Pappa Carr. Uncharacteristically for us, there has so far been very little debate as to how to handle this...so far.
The reason this has not been a difficult choice goes back a long way. Early on in our relationship Fergotron made it very clear that kids were an important part of her near future. It was important for her and I was grateful to know early on (although, the second date might have been a touch too soon) and so we discussed this situation long before we needed to. I have to admit that I was a bit concerned when getting together with Fergotron about her Veggie status – not so much the food, I have been brought up with a vegetarian mother who did not believe in making two separate meals, so I have eaten more than my share of veggie food and as something of a foodie I enjoy the variety it brings. But with that said, I do love a huge slab of mature meat, gently cooked so that it’s nice and pink in the middle, a mixture of fat and bloody goodness swirling around the plate and possibly covered with a sauce made from the left over juices, or a gravy, or just a cup of steak juice. I’m excited just thinking about it.
It is the latter fact that concerned me - would this relationship go anywhere with my love of meat, some veggies can be seriously pious about this kind of thing, but my fears were abated early on. Fergotron had hoped to end up with a meat eater to ensure that her children had the choice; they had a balanced view and knew that they could go whichever way they pleased. Winner. The one caveat? That she wouldn’t cook the meat, or certainly handle it raw. That was (and is) fine by me.** So once the Kiwi Face was on the way we had no need to talk it over again. We did, I’m sure, but only as a recap. Everyone was happy with the deal, there was no need to change it.
And so now Lizzy Face eats proper food (as oppose to just milk) and has a balanced diet from a balanced viewpoint. If she is to have meat I prepare it, Fergotron will happily reheat it (I make things like beef lasagne, koftas, meatballs etc unless I am eating with here there and then). It’s good, she seems to really enjoy beef although it does make her farty and the nappies of doom take on a whole new level of terror after meat, it stings the eyeballs.
Fergotron, to give her her due, is branching out into the brave new world of fish both preparation and cooking. She even goes to the fish counter and faces the fish eye to eye. Which anyone reading who is a veggie will appreciate is a bold move indeed.
Fergotron, to give her her due, is branching out into the brave new world of fish both preparation and cooking. She even goes to the fish counter and faces the fish eye to eye. Which anyone reading who is a veggie will appreciate is a bold move indeed.
As to the future, who knows? My philosophy in life generally is believe what you like, it’s up to you but don’t preach it to others. I have a very good friend who is vegan who has very much this approach, happy to discuss if asked, but never judging or pushing his own belief. I hope to bring Lizzy up the same way. By setting the example of accepting each others choices, with any luck Lizzy will grow up with a balanced outlook and feel able and confident to make her own choices. Whether she believes meat is murder or that if God didn’t want us to eat animals he wouldn’t have made them out of meat, Lizzy will not face any judgement, disappointment or challenges at home – so she will never have to choose between mummy and daddy.... at least in terms of food.
**however, there have been a couple of times when it is frustratingly comical. For example, once while we lived in London I had been having a horrible time at work and as a treat Fergotron made me a surprise dinner when I got home, with a very nice piece of meat. I got home, was informed of my special treat and sat down waiting to be looked after, and then a few moments later I was called up to the kitchen to cook my own surprise dinner as Fergotron couldn’t touch the meat. A very sweet thing to do, and though frustrating, only in a very comical way. It’s the thought that counts, and anyway, she poured the wine at least